


120/80

by grimeysociety



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Darcy Lewis Needs a Hug, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Tumblr Prompt, WinterShock - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:28:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22300345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grimeysociety/pseuds/grimeysociety
Summary: He was sorry he got hurt. He was sorry he couldn’t stop things that neither of them had control over. He was sorry that he made her life stressful.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Darcy Lewis
Comments: 22
Kudos: 234
Collections: Ladies of Marvel Bingo 2019





	120/80

**Author's Note:**

  * For [anais_ninja](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anais_ninja/gifts).



> This was written for a couple of reasons: It was suggested, and then I also decided to work one of my Ladies of Marvel Bingo 2019 squares into it. Specifically, the square was E4: "Please, just kiss me already". The specific _suggestion_ went like this on Tumblr:
> 
>  **anais-ninja-bitch** : what do you consider the internet equivalent of various expressions of affection? how to hug? to kiss? to dance? to pat on the back? to hum contentedly? to roll the eyes fondly? to make a shakey reach forward then pull back?  
>  **grimeysociety** : oh boy, I read that as “shakey reach around”  
>  **anais-ninja-bitch** : girl.  
>  **grimeysociety** : what? SOMEbody’s gotta keep their head in the gutter  
>  **anais-ninja-bitch** : girl. write it and link me.
> 
> So here it is.

_Don't know how to keep loving you_  
_Now that I know you so well_  
_I just wanna keep loving you_  
\- **"Don't Know How to Keep Loving You"** **by Julia Jacklin**

_Somebody need me too much._  
_Somebody know me too well._  
_Somebody pull me up short,_  
_And put me through hell,_  
_And give me support,_  
_For being alive._  
_Make me alive._  
\- **"Being Alive" by Stephen Sondheim**

Darcy remembered a brief period of her childhood in which she aspired to be a nurse. Specifically a nurse “for babies”, her mother loved to tell her.

“You’ve wanted a baby since you were a baby,” she always said, when they talked about her eccentricities that dated back to infancy. “And you wanted to look after babies.”

Then as Darcy got older, she understood what hospitals were like, and she was terrified of them. They unsettled her, knowing this was a place people could die in. She still loved nurses for everything they did, it was a thankless job, and she knew she didn’t have the bravery to become one.

Weaving through med bay personnel, she was looking for a familiar face. She felt something loosen and then her heartbeat picked up once more as her eyes fell on Steve standing with his hands on his hips, talking to someone in a white coat. He was wearing his post-mission outfit of sweatpants and a plain white t-shirt, a couple marks on his face, looking tired more than hurt. He turned when he recognized her, the white coat walking away as Darcy raced over to him.

They embraced, Steve squeezing her tight with his arms wrapped around her, leaning down to press a kiss to her cheek.

“He’s okay,” he whispered.

The broke apart and Darcy passed a hand over her face.

“What the hell happened?”

“Couple superficial cuts, we got out of there pretty fast, after –”

“Steve,” Darcy said, her voice steady, reaching out to touch his arm.

Something passed over his face and she knew he was taken back to when Bucky was thrown from the train every time he witnessed his best friend wiped out. He drew in a breath, nodding, swallowing. He met her eye.

“He got shot.”

Darcy nodded, her eyes prickling. Not because Bucky being shot was the worst thing she’d ever heard – this happened often enough that she trusted it wasn’t always a death sentence when she heard about it. It _was_ still hard to hear. Darcy had never been shot, she was spared from that horror and she hoped to stay that way. It was the way Steve’s whole body changed as he said this, the shame seeping out of him like he’d been cut open.

“He’s okay, now,” she murmured, rubbing his arm.

“Coulda… coulda gone a lot worse,” he mumbled, looking at the floor. “I was yellin’ for him when he fell.”

“Like me in Bruges?” she asked, and he nodded.

Bruges was a vacation Bucky took with her last year, after months of delaying time off. He was scared and she’d dismissed it, and then he was shot by a sniper on top of a church and Darcy screamed and screamed when he toppled over, convinced he was instantly dead. The sniper only grazed his ear, less than an inch from his brain.

“They took the slug outta him,” he went on, and Darcy looked at the door behind him.

“He in there?”

“Yeah,” Steve breathed.

“You should go to bed,” she said, and he nodded, too tired to argue. That was rare.

Darcy hugged him goodbye, squeezed his hand when they pulled apart once more. The anxiety from before was replaced with anger, impatience… she wanted to leave, but she wasn’t about to bust Bucky out of there because she’d rather cuddle him in their bed in the apartment.

“Twenty minutes, Steve?” she said, tilting her head.

There was a brief smirk on his face.

“Don’t be so hard on him,” he said. “He saved a couple guys tonight.”

It was almost dawn but Darcy wasn’t going to correct him. He was probably jetlagged on top of everything else, like Bucky had to be.

“Bye,” she said, and he nodded, walking away.

She took a deep breath when she turned to the door, moving to open it and step inside. All the beeps and smells reminded her of the other times she’d been there, and in the other hospitals over her life. She’d seen people in all kinds of states. Comatose, bashful, riddled with tumors…

The man she saw inside was a battered version of Bucky, one that she knew all too well, his eyes hooded as he stared listlessly, his gaze swivelling to hers.

“Twenty minutes, Buck?” she began, and there was a twinkle of something in his eye, his lips curling.

He didn’t move at all from leaning back on his pillow, watching her as she walked over to his bed, dropping her bag on the floor.

“Yeah, I was busy,” he murmured, his voice rough. “You look beautiful, by the way.”

Darcy shook her head with a sigh, picking up the chart that rested at the foot of his bed, reading it.

“Blood pressure is 120 over 80, so there’s that…”

“I could jump your bones right now,” he went on, as if she hadn’t interrupted, reaching for her as she moved to stand beside his bed.

He curled his fingers around her hip, massaging her.

“I’d like to see you try,” she replied, not looking up from the papers. “Good news is all major arteries were spared, y’know, with the bullet and all…”

“Seriously, I just wanna eat ya…”

He grabbed her, pulling her toward him, his arm wrapping around her as he buried his face in the crotch of her jeans, Darcy’s hand dropping to his head as he sighed against her.

“Twenty fucking minutes, Bucky?” she hissed, and he pulled back a little, resting his chin on her belt, staring up at her. “You took twenty minutes to call me? We have a rule. It’s one rule.”

“Yeah, I know,” he whispered, his smile beginning to fade.

Darcy felt herself deflate a little in turn but she was still upset, cupping his cheek.

“You _tell me everything_ ,” she said. “What happened?”

He drew in a breath, his eyes looking elsewhere, above her head, remembering everything. He looked as exhausted as Steve was before.

His throat worked as he began. “Uh… just…”

He met her eye again.

“Kids. Kids with guns.”

Darcy blinked at him, her eyes wider. He nodded, her hand beginning to stroke his hair.

“Yeah, it was these kids,” he murmured. He cleared his throat. “We got the squadron out, I managed to shoot some guys hidin’ way out…”

 _He saved a couple guys tonight,_ Steve had said.

“…and then we saw these two kids, and we thought they were witnesses, just comin’ out ‘cause they heard the commotion, the men hollerin’…”

His face changed again, the curtain coming down, his eyes colder.

“Shot me in the fuckin’ stomach.”

Darcy grabbed his chin, turning his head toward her to look her in the eye, and he frowned at the force of her, probably annoyed she was still trying to engage so much. He tended to shut down easily, but she thought was only with people other than herself and Steve.

“Hey,” she said. “You did nothing wrong. I was worried, that’s all.”

“Let my guard down,” he said, irritated. “Stupid. I won’t do that again.”

“You couldn’t have known two kids were armed, Bucky,” she said, and he shook his head. “Fine, be that way.”

She moved aside, his hands dropping from her and he moved back to settle against his pillow. She glanced at the papers again.

“You have to stay a few more hours.”

His healing was advanced but Steve was still king when it came to flesh rejuvenation. Bucky still scarred as well, and she could picture the mark that the bullet would leave behind, first purple and then pink and then white.

She put the papers back at the end of the bed and grabbed the chair against the wall with the window above it and dragged it closer to Bucky, sitting down with her arms folded.

They both stared at one another, a stand-off, and Darcy clenched her jaw, frowning.

They were interrupted by the nurse who came by to check Bucky’s vitals, the doctor arriving soon after. Darcy stood from her seat to sake their hand, the nurse preoccupied with Bucky’s IV, wheeling it in as Bucky looked annoyed and sleepy again, staring into space.

“I’m Darcy,” she said. “Discharge in a few hours?”

The doctor gave a half-smile, nodding.

“We know how these squad guys are like, they don’t want to be here but they have to. Company policy,” he replied. “We know about Sargent Barnes’ healing process as well, but this is a necessary precaution. He lost a lot of blood.”

“ _Some_ ,” Bucky corrected under his breath, his eyelids looking heavier already.

“Don’t mind him,” Darcy replied, turning her head back to the doctor. “Could he have a tranquilizer?”

The doctor blinked at her.

“I’m joking,” she said, holding up a hand. “Could _I_ have something? I’m joking again. I saw he’s on pain meds already.”

“Yes, we’re giving him more now and then he should sleep,” the doctor said.

The nurse hooked up the new IV as the doctor left, and once Bucky and Darcy were alone once more, she took hold of his cybernetic hand and squeezed it.

“Get into bed wi’ me,” he slurred, and Darcy leaned down to kiss his cool metal knuckles. “I could give you a good time…”

“I know, baby,” she whispered, and she stood up to reach his face, pressing a slow kiss to his lips.

She could see he was out by the time she pulled back, his eyes closed with his lips parted.

-

Darcy started awake a couple hours later, her knees pulled up on the armchair, her neck hurting from the way she’d bent everything to try and curl up. She breathed deeply, stretching as she put her feet back on the floor, looking over at Bucky. He was still asleep.

She could see the sun coming through the window and she picked up her phone from her bag, opening up a new message to Jane.

**_I’m taking the day off. Bucky’s in hospital. He’s okay._ **

She sent it, tucking it away when she saw the reply pop up, which was Jane wishing them both well. If she scrolled back over the months in her messages to her boss, she wondered how many of them were like that, her saying she needed to be with Bucky for one reason or another.

Sometimes they both took mental health days together, and they always ended up in the same place, either on the couch or in bed, or the kitchen counter… or the floor, wrapped up in each other like time was running out when it _wasn’t_ , Darcy needed to keep reminding herself of that.

-

Bucky was discharged around noon and Darcy walked out with his arm around her shoulders, her arm wrapped around his waist. He was quiet, more co-operative than earlier.

She waited for the inevitable moment of heavy apologies, which came when she went into the kitchen to make coffee, Bucky moving up behind her to wrap his arms around her waist and kiss her cheek.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

He was sorry he got hurt. He was sorry he couldn’t stop things that neither of them had control over. He was sorry that he made her life stressful.

“It’s okay,” she whispered back. She accepted it, but she didn’t blame him for anything, and she knew what she was getting into.

When they first met, she was instantly drawn to him but she waited for him to approach her, to touch her for the first time. She knew his trauma and experiences made him less trusting, which meant it had to be earned over time through gentle presses of friendship and humor.

“No, I’m sorry,” he whispered again.

That meant he was worried he could have died. She’d been worried about that, too, when Steve called her at 2AM with the news that Bucky was hurt. It was always what she dreamt of when she had nightmares.

She could feel he wasn’t entirely steady on his feet, his feet moving too much as he tried to stay standing behind her, his balance off.

She felt his lips brush her throat, his hand coming up to her stomach, his other on her chest.

“Okay,” she whispered, chuckling a little. “I forgive you…”

She dropped her hand from the counter down behind her back, managing to squeeze his shaft through his sweatpants, Bucky’s breath coming out in little pants as he sucked at her skin.

His hand fumbled with the button of her jeans before shoving down her front to cup her, his middle finger pressing down on her clit, Darcy’s moan cut off by his kiss, her hand squeezing him again.

His hand was shaking as he played with her.

“Thought it’d only be fair,” he whispered, pulling back to kiss her neck and jaw. “To give you a reach around...”

Darcy smiled, feeling a fresh flood of arousal at the sound of his rumbling voice.

“You’re so beautiful…”

She reached up with her other hand to wrap around the back of his neck, her fingers threading through his hair, her hips canting to meet his hand.

“Bucky…”

He sensed it in the urgency in her voice and he hummed against her, and she heard the sound of his sweatpants being shoved down, the material rasping against his skin. Then his hands, grabbing, determined, began to pull down her jeans, too, all the while his finger was still rubbing as Darcy rubbed against him.

“What if you fall over?” she whispered.

“Then we’ll do it on the floor.”

She laughed, a breathy one that dissolved into a gasp as he rubbed his cock against the seam of her.

“ _Bucky_ …”

“Can I come inside you?” he whispered, holding her hip, his other hand guiding himself into her slowly, the stretch making Darcy whimper.

“Yeah…”

It was rougher than usual, his hips snapping as he held her in place, Darcy bending over a the waist a little, her feet on tip-toe as she leaned over the counter.

He took deep, fast strokes of her, and he almost stumbled over when he came, Darcy squeezing him tight in earnest, still feeling the aftershocks of her intense climax.

She felt like she was throbbing all over, her ears ringing as he stayed fully seated inside her, his head pressed into the back of hers.

“Fuck…”

“I told you,” he said, and Darcy chuckled, pushing back against him until she could turn her head to look at him properly. “I told you I’d jump your bones…”

She felt her throat tighten with emotion, the toll of the last several hours finally impacting her. Her eyes watered.

“Love you,” she whispered, and his lips quirked as he sucked in a breath, everything hitting him, too.

There was a silence between them, and Darcy watched him watching her, his fingers stroking her cheek.

“Please, just kiss me already,” she whispered, and he smiled wider, before slanting his mouth over hers.

**Author's Note:**

> [my Tumblr](http://grimeysociety.tumblr.com/)


End file.
